The Pitfalls of Vacations, and Advices from Me - Traveller at Home

If you are about to embark on a journey in the form of vacation, don't read this blog because it might ruin your psycho for it. I'm just saying... Don't say I didn't warn you.

See. I myself have not had a vacation for a while. Maybe I'm just jealous of anyone who is going to have one soon. Be that as it may. I will take a run of the pitfalls of vacations here.

Pitfalls

1. Hyped Expectations. Your vacation comes once in a blue moon. You are hyper excited about the selected vacation dates. Just thinking of it makes you sing. The mundaneness of daily life becomes more interesting. Expectation of your vacation gives you something to look forward to. You think of those selected dates as your time of ultimate freedom. If you have to classify your days in the level of freedom, in terms of freedom, Mondays through Fridays have the lowest level, equivalent to be sent to the capital murder prison; Weekends are better but not quite, equivalent to be transferred to a lesser security prison. Vacation is the time you are set free. But expectation, when hyped, hampers your ability to enjoy your vacation because your vacation is now under pressure of living up to that hyped expectation.

Advice: Remember "Expect nothing, live frugally on surprise". Or expect very little so every little thing on your trip comes as a pleasant surprise to you. Go wild but lay low. Don't expect a good meal when the waitress tells you your ordered food is great. When the food comes, and after you taste it, you will know.

2. Fixed Return Date. Unless you drive, you buy a non-refundable round trip flight ticket ahead of time. You always do. You'd better have a return-ticket. Besides logistic reasons, a one-way ticket might trigger the airport security alert for a suicide bomber. The set return date and pre-paid return flight ticket save you from unforseeable hassles and give you a peace of mind. However, when the return date comes, you are either too eager to leave, or you wish you could have stayed longer.

Advice: When you plan a vacation, prepare for a flexible return date. If it's the same airline and same flight time on a different date, airline companies usually do not charge you anything for changing the ticket.

3. News Broadcasting. "I'm going to Hollywood!". "I'm going to Hollywood!". In the last episode of American Idol where the audition took place in LA, those selected idol candidates were jumping up and down with their yellow sheets - their golden tickets to fame. Don't they know they are already in Hollywood! It's LA for God sake! After you finish planning your vacation, you are like those selected American Idols broadcasting your vacation news "I'm going to Pakistan!" "I'm going to Paskstan!" because you are now holding that yellow sheet - your reserved electronic flight ticket to a vacation destination.

Advice: Hush! Keep your vacation a secret so if you change your mind, you don't have the liability of correcting the news again. Also, when you broadcast your travel news, you are likely to encounter two types of responses: the skepticism and the advice. The skeptics feed you with fear: "Are you sure it's a good time to go next month: swine flu, terrorists, plane crash, earthquake, poor Haiti... Isn't that morally wrong to vacation in Haiti while the people there are suffering? " The advisers feed you with unwanted information you prefer finding out yourself: "Where are you going to stay? I stayed there many times before. They have this coolest waterfall pool and tram ride. Oh you should check such and such..." So don't broadcast your vacation news. After you come back, if they ask you what you did last weekend, you just say with an expressionless face. Not much. Oh. I almost forgot I went to Tuscany. Watch their reaction. They will do the post-trip news broadcasting work for you. "Can you believe so and so went to Tuscany last week?"

4. Pressure of Having Fun. Because of your hyped expectations and your previous news broadcasting, you are now supposed to have fun. You owe it to yourself, and everyone else you broadcasted to because they demand your fun update when you return. You are psychologically pressed to have fun. You've got to tan your face in the sun though you could have done that at home mowing lawn for the same result. You've got to get out doing things. You shall not fail yourself and others by just doing nothing? Act I: Actions. Go!

Advice: You don't need to jump into the go-go mood as soon as you check in the hotel. That's work. Remember: this is your vacation. Sleep in. Hang loose. Disguise yourself as a local, not as a tourist. Only then you will start to relax and enjoy your vacation.

5. Reporting to and Checking in with the Base. Have you ever encountered this situation? Just as you lie down on the beach, enjoying the warm sun and the soothing sound of ocean waves, you hear a guy behind you talking on the phone, reporting every move of his, to someone on the other end of the phone. "I got here last night. I just came to the hotel beach. Man. It's gorgeous! It's sunny, about 80 degree. I have a book with me. I'm laying down my towel on the beach and I will then take a swim. What are you doing?” If he annoys you, don't be like him.

Advice: If you are in an emergency, call 911. If anyone back home is in an emergency, they will call 911. You are thousands of miles away; there is nothing you can do about it. Unless you need bail money because you are thrown in jail, you have large sums of business money at stake, or if you are dying in the hospital, you don't really need to call anyone, reporting what you are doing and where you are. You are on vacation. Get lost. The more you are lost, you more you are able to embrace the new experience as it comes during a vacation. If you want to brag about how much fun you had, wait until you get back. Your phone takes away your precious vacation time, as well as not putting distance from the familarity you are trying to run way from. Usually if you still remember to call, it's a sign that you are not having fun. Not to check in the Base is the kind thing to do for your own sake and the Base people's sake. Really. If you hear your Base location is sunny while your vacation spot is raining, you will question yourself why you are here. If the Base people hear how much fun you are having while they are working, it just makes their misery more miserable. Leave your phone alone. If you have to check messages, do so first thing in the morning and last thing in the evening.

6. Peace Sign. If there are Japanese tourists around you, bet with the person next to you, that the Japanese will put on that peace finger sign above their heads when they take photos of each other. I guarantee you will win the bet, every time. What's the deal with the peace sign when people take photos?

Advice: The peace finger sign for photos is a Japanese girlish thing to do. It's outdated. We Americans are in a time of war. If your fingers are really itchy and they have to stick out during photo shooting, just the middle finger is enough. No more two fingers please!

7. Photo Shooting. You take a camera with you everywhere you go. If it's not a light-weighted waterproof camera, someone has to stay onshore just to watch your camera. You want to have as many images as possible to remember, and to show for after you return home. You don't watch the sunsets. You just shoot photos of the sunsets. In lieu of traveling, you photograph (Gosh, that's me!).

Advice: A vacation is a great photography opportunity. If you are a paid professional photographer, it's understandable you look at everything through your lens. Everyone else: why can't you just enjoy the quiet sunset moment and forget about posing for photo shooting for a change. You might want a couple of photos to remember that magic image forever, fine. But if you don't put down that camera, be still, hear your breath, and watch the motion of sunsetting, you might as well stay home watching the travel channel.

8. Bragging. You come home in one piece. For at least a couple of weeks following the trip, you relive your trip by sending trip photos, and recounting the events of the trip until everyone grows tired of it.

Advice: Go ahead bragging. Let others get jealous of, or hate you for having too much fun while they suffer at home the entire time. Haha. Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Welcome to reality. Tomorrow is Monday. Go back to your capital murder cell!